Before 50

 So many goals and so little time.  A quiet and drizzly Saturday morning with dogs snoozing around me.  Time to think and contemplate.  Again, trying to envision how I will use my energy and where I will invest my time in the future.  I have always been a goal-oriented person.  Independence and discipline have never been my strong suit, but goals and projects and timelines truly help me structure my life and give it purpose and drive.  I hope living my life using some of these principles will help me find fulfillment and purpose in life moving forward.

With that in mind, I think ahead to the next few years.  Approaching my 46th birthday later this month, it makes me consider the goals and projects I can accomplish (and hope to do so) before I turn 50 in just a few short years:

-Another (and final) degree in my education and possibly a published book of some kind.

-Travel with my family including Ireland, Europe, Japan, New Zealand, Hawaii (again), and as many visits to my hometown of Juneau as possible.

-Visit national parks, museums, and places of education with my children.

-Adventures and experiences including interactions with animals, zip-lining, skydiving, hiking, hot air balloon.

-Experience more live music, sports, and entertainment, and promoting my family to seek-out more live experiences with the arts.

So many adventures, so little time.  These are some of the dreams and goals to invest my energy and time into moving forward for the next few years.  What a nice way to rise each morning, with such things to look forward to...

-a

Spending in 2026

 

2025 was a special year for our family, with many highlights.  Below are just a few pictures of what made it a year of growth and fun and adventure.  Traveling and exploring are so much fun, and I hope to set more dates and locations to enjoy moving forward!  One concept that is worth considering is how we spend our energy.  While the new year often brings resolutions, I now prefer to reflect on the previous year and then consider how I might better spend my time and energy in the year ahead.  More travel, more fun, more adventure, more laughter, more trying new things, more new places and experience, and be sure to revisit our favorites when we can!  How will you spend your energy in the next year?  

-a

A special meal at White Fence Farm with family to remember our Cousin, Carry.  A great meal with lots of laughs.  

Abel and Sam attend the traveling Broadway production of Clue!  So much fun!  

Our family traveled to New York in 2025 to watch Audrey perform in Central Park with her band!  What a fantastic time, and so many memories from the Big Apple!

2025 brought us Rosie, our newest family member!

Sam started 2025 playing in the snow.  How will 2026 start?

Violet and Abel attend the Chicago/Lakers game!  The shot of the year!

Baseball has a special place, not necessarily because of the game, but because we get to just be and enjoy together.  

Getting to visit Hook and Ladder was a thrill in 2025!

Audrey and family in Central Park!

Go, Cubs, Go!  A Cubs game with Uncle Fred is always a special treat, and 2025 delivered!

Hawaii in 2025 with my family was a highlight.  

Audrey and Sam, Oahu 2025.

I love this picture.  We are just returning from the luau and it is tradition to leave your lay on the Stitch totem for good luck!  

My family at Pearl Harbor on our last day in Hawaii.  

The single greatest experience of 2025 was seeing an erupting volcano in Hawaii.  This picture reminds me how special life is, and how fortunate I am.

Violet and Abel on Lemisure Island, Alaska, 2025.

Surprising Kim with Savannah Banana tickets in Pittsburgh!  2025 reminded me to always take the adventure!

At the Buddhist temple in Hawaii with my family.  A place of peace and inner reflection.

A special meal with family in Pittsburgh before the Savannah Bananas game!  The view only overshadowed by the company! 

Violet in Juneau holding a chunk of the Mendenhall Glacier!

I am so thankful for Kim and Audrey in 2025, and always.

Family Christmas photo, 2025.

Audrey in Flute Salad.  She is so talented!

2025 brought Sam's first swim competition!  We are so proud!

I am so thankful for Violet in 2025, and always.

Audrey and Violet playing for the first time together.  I am so proud of these two young ladies.  They work so hard and care so much.  I hope they know how much they are loved.

I am so thankful for Kim.  She is my rock and represents everything good that I have in my life.  I am so fortunate.  2025 was a good year because of Kim!

The final picture on my camera roll.  Our family (and Audrey's boyfriend) enjoyed bringing 2025 to a close at the Great Wolf Lodge in Wisconsin Dells!  2025 was a special year for our family.  

Sunday Silence

 I like this Sunday morning time to write and think and post.  Thre is something special about sitting in silence or in a quiet space and just letting thoughts flow freely.  I was talking to Sam last night and explaining silence because he said he was afraid of darkness and silence.  I told him that darkness and silence are very important because they allow us to be still and take-in the world around us.  Our senses become heightened in the darkness and when engulfed in silence.  Silence often allows us to hear what is going on in our minds and bodies.  Even this morning, I am savoring the time to just sit with some coffee and listen to the quiet of a Sunday morning as the world wakes up and I can listen to what is happening inside my own head and heart.

The days are moving and the children are older.  Audrey is driving and working so hard in school and with her flute playing.  Violet is on the basketball team and earning high marks.  Sam is responsible every day for his work and cleaning and seems to learn a little more each day and leaves his small child self a little further behind.  

There are adventures on the horizon, which keeps me motivated and excited.  The older I get, the more I look forward to adventures, new experiences, and making memories with my family and friends.  There are few material things I want anymore that are out of reach, so there is a peace that comes with recognizing that people and time are the most valuable things to me, and ot necessarily the latest tech. or gadgets or toys (although those are still very fun, too!)

This is the second half of my life now.  There is a lot that races through my mind when I come to grips that I am more than half-way through my own life.  Time seems infinite until a point, and I think almost all of us realize that we are moving closer to the end than the beginning.  There is something very freeing about this concept to me, as I feel less pressure to perform for others, and more to simply be true to who I am and how I feel internally.  I am thankful for all of this time, and hope to make my family proud and accomplish the things I find most important in my own life, and not be so consumed by what the rest of the world is telling me.  

So these are the things I am hearing inside my own head right now as I sit in the silence of this Sunday morning.  The rest of the world is stirring, so this may be a good time to stop this ramble.  After I publish, I think I will try my best to sit still for just a few more minutes to see what else I can hear...

-a

One Step at a Time

 A quick check-in today.  The family continues the daily grind of school and work and such.  We have time to laugh and play and all of the other things, too...which is really nice.  Everyone has their own lives and it is quite the thing to see how the kids deal with the challenges life throws at them.  It is difficult, as a parent, to see new stresses and anxieties your children take as the world expects a little more of them each year...and it is just awesome to see how they simply continue to respond to their challenges with courage and dedication to be a good human and their best selves.  

On a simply outrageous note...

I learned a valuable lesson last night:

Don't leave brownies outside to cool, as they attract a giant opossum that hisses in a terrifying manner.  

Sometimes just letting the brownies cool on the stove top and being patient is best.  

-a

A New Sun Rises....The Same Sun

 This might be the greatest cup of coffee I have had in a long while....or maybe it is the moment rather than the drink in hand.  I sit looking out the window on a zero degree morning.  Two dogs have had their breakfast and morning constitution, so they are satidfied, now especially that they have received some extra scratches under the collar!  Oskar snoozes under a blanket on the floor while Luna is ever-present, curled up at my feet on the couch.  

Violet

Kim

Audrey

The country is celebrating MLK Day, but also the next president returns to sit on his throne, and we hold our breaths.  It is a solemn Monday morning, and we are now in 2025.  It has been too long and I have left this blog unattended and the children have become less so since then.  They are older, learning so much more on their own now.  They are harder to talk to yet I can see so many things they know and do just from having been that age once, too.  

Sam

Abel

The last time I attempted to write was in August, which was the one year anniversary (roughly) of the passing of both my father (Joel), and step-father (Ted).  I have also been working in an exciting position at a new school this year, and somehow all of this has combined with the sweetness of my family to create a general contentment and satisfaction in my life that has been missing for some time.  This is no one's fault except my own.  The love and support they have given me as I find my path to healing and moving forward have truly been my salvation in so many ways.  This has allowed me to evolve and fully apply myself at school, which in turn gives me great professional satisfaction....another thing that has been missing for a long time.  

I simply find myself humbled and thankful for all that I find myself surrounded by.  I will try to do better writing and documenting this life moving forward, as it brings me another piece of satisfaction.  

Damn this coffee is good.

-a

Enjoying the Morning

 Someone once said that most things in our lives are the dreams of others:

-The meals we eat every day are the dreams of someone who is hungry.

-The house that seems messy to you is the dream of someone who is homeless.

-The time we spend together is the dream of someone who has lost.

The quiet morning is all I can ask for as our spring break begins.  The daily things we do...school, work, early mornings, meals, lessons, etc....our whole house has been working so hard.  It will be nice to slow down and just be for a few days.

It has been nice to see some friends lately, and also to see our own children forming and developing relationships with friends and being social.  Children are a true wonder, and it is amazing to see how far each of our three have come.  Pride is a word that doesn't seem grand enough when it comes to how I feel about their accomplishments in school and their talents in music and arts and athletics.  However, I am most amazed at their kindness and wanting to just be good towards others in general.  

The rest of spring break has no real outline other than cleaning and really trying to attach projects around the house.  With Disney in our rear view mirror and Juneau ahead on the summer horizon, we all felt like just being home and resting.  The final push towards summer break will be a long one in some ways, and recharging seems to be on the menu for the week!  How lucky we are!

-a

A Whatever Day

 A quiet little Saturday morning in February.  The day hasn't made up its mind yet as far as where it will take us all.  Maybe errands...maybe somewhere just for the sake of getting out of the house....whatever.  It is a "whatever" day.  

But I still enjoy the stillness of the house.  There is a peace and deep contentment knowing that my whole family is sleeping and safe.  There is a lot to be thankful for.  

Geese honk in the distance outside as they fly over the grey morning clouds.  Dogs snore quietly at my feet.  Kids (and wife) snuggled under their blankets.  There is no hurry right now, and that is wonderful.  So let the day arrive whenever.  Whatever.

-a