Lost in the Gray

 We are now into the first couple weeks of summer...something I like to refer to as "The Gray".  It is a time when we shed most of our schedules, tensions, habits, and routines from the school year and simply marinate in the time we have with minimal scheduling or activities.  The children get to sleep until they are awake, and stay awake until they are asleep.  Screens, movies, snacks, softball, walks, bikes, runs, books, art, STEAM projects...these are the things that have filled The Gray lately.  

We stew and enjoy the lack of any real time constraints for the moment, but bigger things are on the horizon that will require our awareness of the calendar!  We are looking forward to seeing Aunt Eden in a week, and will need to get the house in operating conditions as far as general cleanliness goes.  Audrey also has high school marching band practice as well as flute lessons and a recital coming up!  Violet will be busy with basketball camp and general hanging out with friends around the neighborhood.  Sam has been active with his STEAM projects, and going to the park and library with me.  Baseball games, Zoo trips, movie nights, carnivals, baking, cooking, walks, and many other mini-adventures await out there on the horizon for us.

Today is another lazy start but also so enjoyable.  Sam and I are on the couch and the girls are asleep, after another night of being awake way too late.  The day is supposed to be a cooler one, so maybe a walk this afternoon with the dogs!  Keep it simple, keep it simple.  Things will get more complex as time moves forward, but for now I am savoring these quiet mornings and simple times.  There will be time, soon enough, where we will look back on these unstructured mornings with great envy.  

-a

Summer Upon Us

 The sun has risen and faint sounds of robins chirping are ushered through the open window along with a cool morning breeze.  The neighborhood is slowly beginning to stir on this Memorial Day, and the possibility of a doughnut run grows ever-larger in my mind.  More importantly, however, is the fact that this is the first Monday of our summer.  For the foreseeable future, there is no more school....lesson plans....anxiety....grades...homework....

Just summer.

The days are endless with possibility, and they will be what we make of them.  Trips to the zoo, baseball games, bike rides, night walks, running, playing, sleeping...adventures to Indiana, Minnesota, Alaska...it is all in front of us...and there is the thrill of it all.  Periods of time that are not yet determined for us...that is the adventure.  Where choice is what we have, the power we wield.  All too often, our time is already accounted for and spent.  It is considered wise to know where you will be in life at certain pints in time, but we often feel that time is moving too quickly in an effort to reach those certain points.  Now, though, we have time that is yet spent...time that has not been assigned a post...time that is ours to distribute.  

So I savor the cool breeze and the serenade of the robins, and I can hear Sam stirring upstairs.  The coffee is good and the calendar is empty for now...and I am doing my best to enjoy this time that is mine.

-a

The Quiet Morn

 It is a quiet Sunday morning, as the rest of the family is still in their weekend slumber.  We now find ourselves at the very edge of the school year, just a few days away from summer break.  Audrey will be promoted to high school in three days, and Violet to middle school in 5.  Three children in three schools next year for the next three years!....but those are concerns for another time.  For now, we remained focused on finishing the school year and beginning the transition into summer.

The windows are open and fresh, cool air flows freely into the main level of the house.  My coffee cools and I listen to the sounds of the robins outside and the dishwasher humming quietly in the kitchen a few feet away.  Sam is asleep on the couch, as we watched a movie and stayed-up late, and he welcomed the chance to be a big kid and sleep downstairs.  Sigh...it is all moving too quickly.

The prospect of summer is wonderful, but it still feels like an eternity of a week ahead of us.  Finishing a school year requires a different kind of energy and effort.  Looking forward to the summer, we will try to plan lots of small adventures and time with family.  For now, though, I am content to sip my coffee, enjoy some fresh bagels, and wait quietly until the rest of the family is awake and active...for the moment we are in is what we have..and the moments ahead are never promised. 

-a

Sam and his Easter Egg

Audrey and her Easter Egg

Dad and Violet enjoying ice cream in downtown Plainfield

A chilly night out by the fire

Celebrating Uncle Michael the best way we know how

A fun night at the Slammers Game!

Enjoying the Solo Stove and a nice evening!

Got to do some Ghost busting at the Cougars game!

Fresh bread and bagels this morning!  Yum!

April Musings

 It has been a while since the last post.  That seems to be the theme.  There is so much happening yet it always seems difficult to just sit and write!  Time is such a precious thing and yet I never seem to use mine optimally.  

At the moment, we find ourselves on spring break!  While it is not a Disney vacation, there is something so nice about NOT having any real plans save for a few family events or outings.  Daily dog walks, constant cleaning, lots of movies and games...sleeping in and lounging around the house...just lots of time to BE and breathe.  Both Audrey and Violet are wrapped-up in their online communities of friends and media, and Sam enjoys playing and is currently wrapped-up in the movie "Clue".  It is a refreshing change from digital animation, and also happens to be one of my own personal favorites!  

Last night we had some fun at the Hollywood Palms movie theater and watched the new Mario movie.  It was cute, but I always love the experience of seeing all of the old movie posters and movie star autographs and themed theaters.  There is something so special about going to the movies to me.  For a little while, one is transported away to another story, another timeline, another reality.  It didn't hurt that they also serve food, including my favorite pina colada!   

Now the day is starting to unfold, and we will begin preparing for an adventure to the zoo!  It will be nice to see some animals and share some laughs while getting some exercise walking around the grounds.  As stated at the beginning of this post, small adventures and time to just enjoy without the pressures of daily life.

When we return to school next week, there will be only seven more weeks until summer break!  While I am looking forward to June and seeing family and friends over summer, I don't want to take the time in front of me for granted.  Yes, it will be a busy push with lots to do before we can stretch out again, but we will do our best to find the joy in the little things and within each other.  For now, though...on to the zoo!

-a

It Changes

 Shortly after my previous post, the phone rang and my cousin told me that Uncle Michael had died.  I have been in shock and grieving in my own way, and this blog has fallen (once again) to the side.  This morning, the sun has risen and life moves forward...but the world seems a little darker without Uncle Michael in it.

He has been in my earliest memories, and always he has been a source of good, fun, and positive energy.  His creativity knew no bounds and he shared his curiosity and thirst for fun with the rest of the people around him, and the community at large.  I recall going to his house and enjoying the main micro activities such as yo-yos and playing with marbles and magic tricks.  He was always collecting things, such as back scratchers, Earths, maps, and gold pans.  He baked bagels and had friends over for brunch.  He loved brunch.

Space and time seemed to be the things that intrigued him the most.  Looking at the sun through a solar scope, or charting the moon and stars via his home observatory...he always looked beyond the small town of Juneau and out into the cosmos.  His annual time capsules also brought much joy and intrigue.  He started packing items into a box throughout the year, and sealed the box on New Year's Eve, and marked it to be open 20 years later.  He started packing time capsules in 1980, and I didn't understand their power until the first one was opened when I was 20 years old!  Seeing the old phone book, or McDonald's Styrofoam containers, or pictures and newspapers from two decades ago...time was captured and we could see how it had changed.  

The time is now.  

That is one of his favorite sayings.  It is true.  The time is now, just as it was then.  But it changes.  

Michael also loved panning for gold.  Not in that he made any money....actually I am certain he lost much more buying small plastic containers for the gold flakes we found over the years!  It was the act of panning, and the mystery and excitement of seeing those small gold flecks and flakes in the corner of the round pan.  

It was always about the adventure, the people, and the fun for Uncle Michael.  That is what I will try to take with me moving forward.  I haven't even scratched the surface of his many community projects, prolific amounts of mail sent on a daily basis...and many of his other quirks and characteristics.  He taught me to be curious, to be persistent and persevere.  He taught me to have fun and laugh and enjoy the small, funny things along the way.  He taught me that each moment is unique and that it is good to be kind and get along with others.  He showed me the importance of imagination and wonder, and to explore and search-out the fascinating and to always find the fun.  Each moment is an event, and can be celebrated as such.  

I will miss Uncle Michael but I will never forget.  The time is now, and it changes.  

-a

The Last Day of the Tree

 It is a grey, rainy morning.  Kim is starting the morning in her office, returning to her work schedule.  I am thankful I still have a few more days of break remaining, but my subconscious is starting to nag at me, reminding me of all the things I will need to do before returning to teaching.  I really do look forward to seeing my students, but there is also some anxiety and stress building as the realities of "normal life" begin to set-in again.

Winter break has been a good one, although very quiet.  We have not done very much, which seems to be what was needed.  I have thoroughly enjoyed exercising and dog walking every day, as well as the regular rounds of cleaning and just spending time with my children.  It makes me wish there was no work and we could just go on, being a family and spending time together...but alas we must make the most of the time that is given.

Today is the last day with the Christmas tree up.  Tomorrow the children will help deconstruct it.  It is a sad thing to me, as it has always been beacon of light and happiness during the dark winter times.  However, I also recognize that we must move forward and that taking it down is another step towards warmer days and longer periods of light.  

So for today we enjoy its light and then away it goes until next November after Thanksgiving.  Time is a strange and funny thing, and we cannot control it...but we can mark its passing and keep those things that bring us joy sacred as the years pass.  I hear footsteps of a certain 6 year old slowly tromping their way down the stairs...time to go and enjoy the moments that will become today.

-a

A New Year...Why Not?

 And just like that it is a new year.  Like all fresh starts, it is beyond tempting to throw hopes and goals out into the winds of uncertainty and see where they land...if at all!  We sit around the house during break because colds and flu have not given us a large window of social availability....so I am even further driven into the imaginative possibilities that this next year holds.  So what are some goals and dreams and experiences at the top of my list?  Here are a few:

1.  Get better at communicating with my family and in general.  I still put-off things too long and make them a bigger deal in my mind than they really are.

2.  See friends that I haven't seen for a while (both in Indiana and Alaska, specifically).

3.  Read more in general.  I play the "I work and have kids" card too much on this one.  I miss being caught-up in a good story that is just for me.  This includes spending more time reading with my children.

4.  Loose weight (I know...cliche)

5.  Run in 2-3 half marathons this year, and possibly prepare for a return to a full next year!  I'm already signed-up for Grandma's again...so now just time to find at least one more!

6.  Go back to Alaska.  Either Visiting friends in Anchorage and Fairbanks...or some more time in Juneau.  

7.  Move into realistic planning stages of buying a place in Juneau to spend summer at.  While we might not be all the way there, I really miss my hometown and would like to spend summers there!  Again, dreaming big here.  

8.  Seriously write a children's book.  I have ideas...I really do.  I have outlines...I really do....so what else do I need to do besides get my fingers moving and find someone to illustrate!  

9.  Find more time to go on dates and have experiences with my wife.  We both work so much that we have sacrificed a lot..or all of our time that we used to have for US!  

10.  A new tattoo, possibly if I travel to Alaska again!  

While it is not a goal, I have been attempting to type more into this blog and return to my more prolific days.  Hopefully 2023 will bring more photographs and small moments to report back about.

So there are some small and big dreams.  Here's to the winds of fate.  

-a