Moving Forward

And so we look into the new year....a few days remaining in this one, for sure.  However, one can't help but think about renewed hopes and untapped possibilities this time in December.  

The Christmas and Hanukkah holidays were very nice.  It was fun to see some family and open gifts.  Gatherings are something I am thankful for, especially after COVID took them away for a while.   It has been a wonderful year, with adventures as a family to Disney and Juneau the major highlights.  

 I am so proud of Kim and her work, as well as my children and their school and friendships and activities in their own lives.  Audrey continues to work hard with her flute playing and is developing her passion there.  Violet finished her second year of soccer and continues to look for more physical challenges.  Sam overcame his broken leg and has the biggest heart.  I am truly lucky to be a part of this family.

And so now we look ahead...while still trying to enjoy these last few days of 2022 by simply resting and recovering from the strain of making it to this point!  

Personally I like to think of big things, such as visiting friends in Alaska, skydiving, maybe another tattoo...and of course continuing in the field of education and finding more time to spend with my family.  I also hope to read more and try a new hobby or develop a new skill.  The idea of a side hustle isn't out of the realm of possibility, either!  Who knows?  I hope we find more adventures and experiences both collectively as a family and individually, that will help us grow and become better versions of ourselves.  

Wherever you are, I hope this message finds you well.  May 2023 be a year of health, peace, and meaningful experiences for you.  

-a

Cold Rest

 It is -8 degrees below zero this morning.  It feels like -25 with the wind.  It is also the first morning of our winter break.  We are all buried in blankets and comfy clothes.  The coffee is hot and the wind howls.  Christmas is coming, and gifts await wrapping, and the house demands cleaning.  It feels as if everyone has been straining to get to this first morning of break, and now that it is here, we find ourselves on empty.  Now is the time we need to refuel and return to full strength in terms of sleep and rest and general recovery.  Today we take things slow.  Today we take care to take care.  Today is the start of winter break.  Today is a cold rest.  

Baking

Triple Chocolate Chip Cookies

Sometimes it is nice to make something for others.  Sometimes it is necessary to forget about the rest of the world and focus on balancing sugar and butter and eggs and chocolate for a while.  There is something magical each time a pan of chocolate chip cookies is pulled from the oven.  

Classic Chocolate Chip

My mom taught me how to bake at a young age.  Being able to make cookies and pizza dough has served me well over the years.  Learning how to hold the bowl and use a spatula and the measuring spoons and what each ingredient added to the overall production.  Baking is a science of sorts...and also a production with cast members being the ingredients.  When a performer (baking soda) doesn't fulfill their roll...the whole production falls flat (pun intended).  Never-the-less...the show must go on.  

Killer Cupcakes (chocolate and cheesecake chip)

 Now I rely on my trusty standbys....including cookies, bagels, and some bread.  I hope that my own children learn with me in the kitchen and find value in baking their own goods and understanding the superiority of a fresh baked item over its store-bought counterpart.  I hope they see the delight in the eyes of others when it is discovered someone made cookies!  Every winter I find myself retreating into the kitchen to bake...something about cold weather and a hot oven.  I hope to make more loaves of bread this year...give them to others.  There is beauty in the simplicity of the ingredients and method for me.  Flour, sugar, eggs...basic and fantastic at the same time.  

-a

A Cold December Morning

 

Sam gets a dozen of his favorite this morning!

It is quite a thing to wake-up before the sun rises on a Sunday morning.  The chill of December tries to infiltrate our house...but piles of blankets and a relentless heater refuse to let the chill in.  As the coffee brews and the dogs eat their morning kibble, the sun begins to take a peek at the day.  

A load of dishes, clean counters, and folded laundry await the complete sunrise this morning, and now we sit around the living room as a whole family...enjoying the fireplace and some mindless screen time.  Now the morning is rolling and all the small things need attention.  That's ok for a quiet, cold December morning.  

-a 

A Different Thanksgiving

A family US-ie on Thanksgiving by the tree.

All of our bags were packed and ready to go, literally by the door for when I returned home from work on Tuesday.  Our Richmond pilgrimage was set and the gas tank was full  Influenza A had a different plan for Sam and our family, though....as he caught it last weekend and has been battling a fever and symptoms since.  

It was difficult yet easy to make the decision to not travel to Richmond this year.  The pandemic has taught us that it is simply not worth risking health over anything else.  It was sad to have to inform people, but everyone was very understanding and empathetic.  Yet another reason I love our family so very much.

Turkeys

So we made the most of it and placed a grocery order and made all kinds of Thanksgiving foods at home, while caught-up in an endless cycle of video games, movies, TV, and sports.  Lots of memories of Thanksgivings past also flooded our minds and hearts...we could feel the love radiating from afar last night.  

It was not an evening of sadness or regret or missing family, though....but truly helped us realize again just how special it is when we are able to gather together and share time.  Time....there it is.  I realize more and more just how little of it there really is....and just how nice it is when we cross paths and wander down the same route for a while all together.   We are so lucky and it is easy to find reasons to give thanks this season.

Got the solo 10k Turkey Trot in...some strange looks when I gobbled at people.

A Sunday Check-In

 It is a beautiful, albeit frosty, morning.  Sam has joined the "Early Bird Club" with me on this Sunday morn.  He has developed a cough and warm temperature over the night, and we both now sit on the couch watching Scooby Doo.  There is something about weekend morning cartoons.  Saturdays were always my childhood memories of waking up and tuning into a variety of shows, both live and in animated form.  Now I sit with Sam, enjoying some old favorites!  Poor kiddo can't seem to catch a break with his health lately!  

We look forward, now, to a short week of school and work, as we prepare for our annual pilgrimage (pun intended) to Virginia for Thanksgiving!  I have already packed, and Sam designed the Turkey Trot medals for this year's run.  The rest of the family will pack today, and we will hit the road!  We have much to be thankful for this year.  Yesterday, as a way to give a small amount back, I took Audrey and Violet to volunteer a couple hours for Bags of Hope, a food distribution program for families in need.  We helped pack 80 boxes of Thanksgiving dinner items to be delivered to a variety of families and organizations throughout the area.  I was proud of both ladies, as they worked hard and helped beyond themselves.

So now that brings us to now.  The coffee is hot, the cinnamon rolls are about to finish in the oven, and another episode of Scooby Doo is about to begin.  We have plans to set-up the Christmas Tree and Hanukah items out today, which would be a nice thing to have done before break.  Anything this morning to keep a little kid busy and forgetting he has a cold.  Tis the season.  

-a

Low Sun

 Sam and I are curled up on the couch, enjoying some Saturday cartoons and a well-deserved rest.  The ladies are out shopping and having some time out...but the boys stayed home and cleaned and made cookies.  Now we sit with fresh blankets after a warm bath for Sam, savoring some quiet time together.  

The weather has turned.  After daylight savings, it has been dark and a bit depressing in the afternoons with the sun setting at what seems a ridiculously early hour.  I am ready for bed at 6pm when it is pitch black out.  It always reminds me of growing up in Juneau, where it was dark when we woke-up....when we went to school.....and when we got home at the end of the day....winters seemed so long.

I guess that is how I am feeling now...waiting for the first flurries of snow (anticipated in a couple hours).  As the years speed-up...I start to identify more and more with those who made the decision to retire somewhere warm for the winters!   I know that once we adjust, things will be fine and we will have another winter together as a family...it is just some adjustment.  

So now the sun is setting and we are ready to start dinner preparations and maybe a football game on TV...but most likely Ghostbusters.  :-)  While the darkness deepens outside, we keep warm and happy inside our home.  How lucky we are.

-a

Full House Sunday

 It is a full house this morning, with Kim's family visiting this weekend.  There is no reason better than company to actually get your house clean!  The last two weeks have been a lot of organization, planning, and picking-up!  Kim, especially, has been focused on bringing some of her "visions" into reality around the house in terms of new furniture and the arrangement of art and photographs on the walls.  Now that everyone is here, it has been nice to open the doors and let everyone enjoy the house!  The weather has been exceptional and we all attended Violet's final soccer game of the season before enjoying a fire each night as the sun set and the stars made welcome appearances.  

Now it is Sunday, and the kids are all waking up.  The coffee is thankfully hot and in my cup.  While the stifling blanket at times that is family can feel overwhelming and intense, it is also a time of laughter and relaxation and just being together and the river of time continues to flow.  We are all getting older...parents and kids.  We sit around the fire in wonder at hoe we have all made it to this point...and wonder still more about how we will continue forward!  Our children and not really children anymore (well..at least most of them).  

So now Sunday is upon us...the windows are open and the fresh air blows through the main floor.  We are munching on bagels and sip coffee and milk as the responsibilities and obligations of our daily lives begins to stir in the recess of our subconscious.  We are enjoying the time, but recognize it is finite and soon we must all part ways....sigh.  I am thankful for these days and this time.  The fall is falling...and leaves are constantly fluttering to the ground...the warm rays of the sun feel like a final caress before a long goodbye.  

-a

Life Changed

 And just like that, we are in the fall.

This blog is on my mind, but rarely these days do I make enough time for it.  It makes me sad, and I am hopeful that I will find interest enough again to meet-up on those early weekend mornings....like visiting a friend for coffee.  

The summer has now come and gone.  A trip to Juneau was the ultimate highlight, although there was a lot of time to just be and think and breath, too.  On one of the very last days of the trip to Juneau, Sam broke his femur and it has now been just over two months since.  We spent four days in the hospital, including surgery, and many days on the couch in our house.  I have even grown accustomed to it now, and prefer it many times over my actual bed!  Sam was...is....so brave.  He went through the emergency room, an ambulance, the hospital, surgery, recover, physical therapy....and started kindergarten in a wheelchair.  Now he is walking (running mostly) again, and back to "normal".  We are so thankful that he has made such an amazing recovery.  

The days are just packed now that school is back in session.  Life moves faster, too.  Both Audrey and Violet are completely independent...save for the occasional round of laundry or needing a ride somewhere.  Kim works hard as ever, also.  Speaking of work, I have left my position in Homer Glen and now work as a 5th grade teacher in Plainfield!  It is wonderful but exhausting learning the job over again and all of the new systems and teaching all of the subjects again.  It is still thrilling each day, and every day is different.

Maybe more soon...some pictures for a tired blogger perhaps?  

It feels good to be in this space again...if only for a few paragraphs.

-a

Into Summer

 Too long has it been.  We are into our first week of summer vacation/break.  The school year was a success for Violet, Sam, and Audrey.  All are moving forward in their academic careers, and doing very well.  We are so proud of them!  Life continues to move at an outrageous pace, with Violet continuing her sports and athleticism, as well as deep dives into science and technology.  Audrey is focused on friends and the endless battle with cleaning her room.  Sam is learning to read, graduated preschool, and loves to accompany me to the park and play during Violet's soccer practices.  Kim is working as hard as ever, and looks on longingly as we all get summer break.  She gets some time, and will be able to have some adventures, too, as the temperatures climb.

The first week of summer is always one of transition.  The COVID pandemic is over in terms of public fear, and it is nice that the government has taken away most mandatory regulations.  Currently we are having the late night, eat junk, no rules first week of break.  It is like the Wild West for the first few days around here.  Next week will bring something resembling order with mandatory activities such as walks, hikes, the library, zoo, etc. 

For now, we get to just float on the early summer current and let it take us all out to sea for a while.  I am enjoying not setting an alarm clock, and have actually made it to 6am sleeping!  Coffee and a little quiet time are always appreciated on these summer mornings.  Lots of little projects await around the house.  It's not a negative, just recognizing that my time can now be given to such things without feeling a strain or taking away from sleep.  

A soccer game awaits us this morning.  Violet's team, the Terminators (they voted it), are undefeated and today is the final game of the season!  I am proud of how far Violet has come as a soccer player in her first attempts.  It is nice to see her as part of a team.  Time for some more coffee...then the adventures of the day!

-a

Get Moving

 Today is one of those Sundays where it already feels like the pressures of the day are bubbling-up in my mind:  Laundry, dishes, general cleaning, grading papers, lesson planning, exercise, dogs, kids, etc.  I do appreciate having some quiet time in the morning, but also it feels like I am taking away from my productivity sometimes.  I know that things will pick-up shortly as the rest of the house starts to wake-up...but the hardest thing sometimes is just sitting still.

Today should be a quiet one, as Sam seems to have a cold and the girls were all up late last night.  The dogs are looking at me expectantly for a morning walk,  Luna keeps pawing at me for more pets and Oskar keeps a watchful eye on me, in case there are treats involved.  

Well, the sun has risen and the day is awaiting.  I think another cup of coffee and then the laundry and cleaning begins before lunch then lesson planning and grading.  Yes, the day has been set and we will attack it now with vigor!  Hopefully an excellent soundtrack will accompany the day!  

-a

A Day Yet Unwritten

 Another quiet, sunny Sunday morning.  The rest of the family is still asleep...save for these two fur brains that consider themselves dogs at the best of times.  Our dogs have really been a blessing in life.  Ever since I was a child, dogs have been in my life.  They have helped through tough times, and are there throughout it all!  I have explored all of the trails and mountains in Juneau with a dog by my side, including on my daily paper routes!  So it is comforting to see Oskar and Luna, today, playing with my own children and acting as part of the family fabric.  My children have deemed them "The Fun Police" because they bark at me whenever they think I am playing too rough or acting in any way unusual.  Needless to say, I get barked at a lot in my own house.

Our day today has yet to take shape.  The sun and blue skies are whispering promises or a warmer-than-usual day...with spring just on the horizon, it is tempting to consider some time at the zoo!  The usual laundry, cleaning, and shopping are probably on the agenda..but what other adventures could we find today?  Tomorrow is another holiday, and another day at home.  I am reserving this for grading papers and planning for school....so today is really our "fun day".  Taekwando was yesterday for me, which is becoming quire enjoyable.  I love attending with Violet...but have begun to appreciate moving my own body and working on the forms.  It is satisfying to get some push-ups in on a regular basis and also learn some basic kicks and punches!  I had my first belt testing on Friday, and was allowed to double test!  I am confident it all went well, and it was fun to break some boards at the end of the session!  

I have just placed the grocery order for this afternoon...technology is amazing to me.  The laundry is going, the coffee is flowing...maybe an audiobook for a little while?  I love the quiet, but find it difficult to remain in it for long.  Off to find the next morning adventure, while enjoying being part of the Early Bird Club today!  

-a  

Cold Morning--Hot Coffee

 Coffee and tea have been my morning go-to on the weekends....and coffee is really my only go-to on the daily morning commute.  There is something so comforting about a hot cup of liquid in my hand....joining me as I wake-up.  The early morning is really my time of peace, quiet....solitude.  There has been something to the time spend just being and holding still, and breathing.  Just having time to think and let my mind wander without the traditional constraints of time and responsibilities looming.  

It is interesting to see where one's mind travels when it does not have a clear path to follow.  There are the usual things like money and family and job stuff...then the secondary levels of household chores, to-do-items, and the things I know I really should get around to doing items.  Then, however, it gets fun....because once I can get past all of that, I find myself in a place considering the bigger goals....dreaming...thinking about the "what its"....

"What if I go back to school to earn a doctorate?"  

"What if we just moved back to Juneau?"

"What if I drove across the country in a conversion van?"

"What if I focused only on physical fitness for a year?"

"What if I brought the kids to wherever they wanted to go in the world?"

"What will it be like when the kids are away from the house?"

"What if I get another cup of coffee?"

The last one usually brings me back to the moment...as it has at the moment of typing this.  Paul Simon is singing quietly on my phone...telling me we all shall be received in Graceland.  There is something reassuring about that line....

So here I sit...doing my best to hold still and yet let my mind wander.  The snow has started to fall again, and I think it is the perfect time for another cup of coffee before sitting back down to let my mind wander just a little while longer...and dream....before the house wakes up.

-a

Rising in the Morning

 The dogs look at me, waiting for more pets that will undoubtedly arrive at some point in the near future.  I am treed on my couch as they camp-out on the floor directly below my blanketed legs.  The coffee steams, each wisp a whisper into the chilly morning air.  Eggs and hash browns are in the oven, soon to be ready for anyone in the Early Bird Club...something I started a few weeks ago to encourage my daughters to get up before noon on the weekends.  

I have made overnight chili and am now keeping it on low via the crockpot.  Egg muffins, bacon, and hash browns await any member of the early bird club, and brownies are baking int he oven.  I have opened several windows on the main floor in an attempt to get a cold, clean breath of air through this house.  The last several weeks have been more or less miserably cold, and we have spent a lot of time inside.  The cold, fresh air should do this house good and maybe even wake up the rest of the house (save Sam, who had pancakes and is now off playing).  

Laundry awaits my attention, and maybe a run on the treadmill today...but it is nice to not have a lot planned for a day.  Sometimes simple plans are the best ones...I am realizing that more and more as I get older.  Maybe hang some more art and pictures around the house...maybe a book and some Nintendo?  I am lucky to have to make such decisions today.  Right now...another cup of coffee.  The timer just sounded for the brownies.  I was right about the fresh air...

-a

Just a Little Bit More

Sitting in the recliner on a cold, cold Sunday morning.  The dogs are pacing...well at least Luna is.  She has a lot of energy, but Oskar seems content to laze by the fire with me.  Breakfast has been consumed for the dogs, and my egg bake cups (scrambled eggs baked in a muffin tin with a little cheese added) are about 12 minutes away from perfection in the oven.  A hot cup of coffee sweetened by some insanely high caloric creamer sits on the end table.  It is January, and the holidays have past.  I did end up making the calendar and sending it out.  I also was lucky enough to distribute it to a lot of family at Cousin Sam's wedding on New Year's.  It seems that so much has happened since my last post.  Here is a quick rundown:

1)  Christmas was nice, and we had a long winter break from school this year.  COVID kept some family from attending in Indiana...but it was still a nice, quiet time with lots of lights and family time.

2)  Sam and Hannah were married in Kansas City on New Year's.  It was a wonderful event, filled with love and friendship.  It was special to be a part of the event, and Sam and Hannah live in Chicago...so hopefully many visits and a continued relationship close is always a nice thing to look forward to!

3)  It was my 42nd birthday!  Nothing crazy, just grateful to be here and enjoy life with my family and watching them grow up!  

4)  Violet and I have been taking taekwando together for a few months.  She has been working hard on her high red belt, and is finally setting her eyes on preparation for black belt.  She has been really working hard and rededicating herself to her craft, and it has inspired me to work hard in my white and yellow belt form.  I enjoy very much watching Violet lead warm-ups and am just so proud of her work in the arena.

So there it is for now.  A quick, but overdue, update.  The rest of today promises a classic Sunday morning of sleeping-in (for the kids and wife), laundry, coffee, and maybe a few miles on the treadmill if I can muster the motivation!  A frosty hello to all out there who may happen to come across this post!  Spring is not far off, and the sun is shining!

-a